Room Clearing and Ownership – A South Boulder Family

Overview:

This was an opportunity to help a family of four clear the energy of their new great room, their primary living space after a major remodel. This is one of my favorite things to do; I love helping families in this way.

Doug was completely centered and without pretense. He didn’t come in with a bunch of props or ‘doodads’ or any bells and whistles. In some ways it was harder to understand what Doug was actually doing because he was like a real diviner, but without the crystal ball. However, the results were immediate, tangible, and profound.

The Details:

Clearing:

Both of us immediately felt a shift in the space; it was like removing five layers of grime from the room. Suddenly, it had been scrubbed. This happened immediately when Doug came in, before he even started to “work.” That alone was a huge, positive impact from the cleansing.

The traditional way to clear a room is a kind of clean sweep. Basically you move out all the energy that’s been in there and start fresh with new energy. In this instance, this wasn’t appropriate because their beautiful new room was filled with excellent craftsmanship. The contractors had left behind so much good energy in the work they did. The energetic residue or feeling tone held a lot of the love and power that was inherent in the professionalism and the quality of the work that they had done. It was remarkable energy which had a positive impact on the room; it didn’t make any sense to clear it out.

So I did a different kind of clearing which involved doing some sorting as we cleared. This allowed the couple to select which aspects they wanted to keep. In order to do this I helped the room field “self sort.” The room revealed which energetic aspects weren’t appropriate to keep in the field space. One of my first impressions was of a certain amount of frustration. Because I’ve built things before, I could certainly relate to the frustration of the contractors and craftsmen who did the work. Because this was a clear thing that we could actually name; it was relatively easy to let it go.

There was also an inappropriate relationship with time which I was surprised to find so strongly expressing in the room’s field. There was a distinct feeling that the room field was very busy; there was a lot of energetic hustle and bustle there. My first sense was that this was from the contractors who are always under deadlines. Contractors have to do a good job, but usually they need to have it finished yesterday or the day before. However, as we explored this energy, it became clear that this was a combination of the historical energy of this family and the recent contractor energy. Since 1991 this “hurry up” energy had been the mode of operating for the family. This residue was so strong because the adults used speed as their deep, underlying way of living. The contractor’s hurriedness had only made things worse. The remodel was part of a larger process within the family to change how they operated. They had been working to slow things down, spend more time as a family, etc. This newly created great room was designed to be the center of this family’s home; it was where they cooked, hung out as a family, and ate their meals. This ‘hurry, hurry, rush, rush’ energy seemed obsolete and very inappropriate for this family, so we worked to release it. Once we had sorted out and acknowledged all the components, this hurried quality seemed to just bleed out of the room’s energy field.

As we cleared out the frustration, the hurry, etc., the room settled into a lovely state of stillness; it felt easier and so much quieter. All four family members visibly relaxed. The mom and dad ended up stretched out on the floor and the two kids were playing quietly. It was just great; we all settled into a state of ease.

In describing Doug’s clearing to others, I used this analogy. The different energies were like smoke. It’s like your house is full of fifteen colors of smoke that are all mixed together, all mixed up. Some smoke is thicker, some is lighter. Some of the smoke is so dense, it’s really hard to breathe or to function. The whole house was filled with different kinds of smoke, different kinds of energy. Doug walked in the door and the first thing that happened was that all fifteen colors of smoke organized themselves, so that each color was more distinct. So, instead of all these mixed up colors and all their many permutations, the colors became clearer and easier to perceive. Then Doug sat down and began to work with these different smokes or energies. Obviously, the five dark colors didn’t need to be here because they felt very negative and not helpful. Doug quickly helped those five colors exit. After that there was this major lightness in the room; one because the energy was more organized and two because the major heavy “ickie” energies were gone. From there we were able to work with the remaining colors that were left. Calmly and without fear we could make some decisions about keeping those energies or transforming them; Doug helped us do what we wanted, instead of imposing what he felt we should do.

Ownership:

Once the unhelpful energies had been cleared, I asked them what they liked about the room, starting with the kids. They began to play for me in the room. For them it was a great new playground, a big space where they could goof off and have fun. As they played the room field became very light; it was filled with fun.

The dad really got into it – he liked lying on the floor in the sun with the dog. He generated this terrific quality of non-work and non-pressure. As he talked, the room started to take on this laid-back sense of great relaxation and ease; the room field filled with very calm, relaxed energy.

For the mom there was more of a communal energy. The remodel included the kitchen. She liked to make food and she liked the togetherness of family meals. As she talked, a real sense of family emerged. This feeling tone was soon reflected in an energetic form in the room field.

It was extraordinary. By the end there was a clear sense of peace and ease in the room. They commented that it felt more like their home than it had during the unsettling months of the construction process. As we basked in the room’s new energy, I talked to them about how the space was dynamic and organic. The energetic field of their great room was a living thing – it was alive, it was dynamic. Whatever they were feeling and experiencing would be reflected in the room field; this was normal, appropriate, and completely okay. We discussed how, over time, the simple act of living in the room would change its field. In time, there would be a relationship between the four primary inhabitants of this house and their primary living space. I helped them see that each of them, in their own way, really loved this new room. We talked about how, if they continue to put that love into the field, then the room actually would start to love them back.

I shared with them about my own treatment room. Because I physically made much of the room and have worked in it for over a decade, I love my room and my room loves me. There’s quite a nice reciprocity of energy there that goes back and forth. It was interesting – I could just begin to feel the emergence, the first hint of the room field’s returned love toward this family. They loved the space and the space was beginning to learn how to love them.

For most people this is a new concept: the energetic field of a place can actually contribute back to people who are in it. We see that in holy places, sacred energy centers, places of great natural beauty – they contribute to us, they impact us, they serve us in meaningful, subtle ways. Together we worked to have that process be conscious instead of just in the background.

Before I left, the adults and I had a conversation about how to deal with the energy of people coming into the great room who were not a part of the immediate family. The focus was on what do you do with their energy. The key here is whether the energy that this particular individual or group of individuals actually serves the room, and in turn serves the family.

Personally, I love the visual of a “patina,” a polish that’s acquired on metal or wood from repeated touching or repeated exposure to weather over time. The energetic field of a room, like their great room, can actually begin to shine or take on a patina from having people in it. If folks have a good experience, when they leave a part of their good energy stays behind. It helps age the room, like people or fine wine or anything that improves with age.

Next we talked about what to do with energy that didn’t serve the room and how to deal with that. It’s quite common to have a visit from a friend who is distressed. But there needs to be an acknowledgment that this person’s grief, anger, frustration, confusion, doubt, worry, etc. belongs to them. These turbulent emotions need to leave with them when they go home. Having somebody else’s challenging emotional energy in your central room isn’t a value or a blessing to the room or to the family.

This leads to the concept of grooming the energetic field of the room over time. It’s very important that there be some level of consciousness about the room field. Caring for the energetic field of your primary living space needs to be included in the responsibilities of the adult inhabitants. This takes deliberate effort, but will pay excellent dividends.

This clearing was successful; everybody was aware that the room felt very much different at the end of our work together than it did at the beginning. Their new primary living space was brighter, happier, easier, and more peaceful.

Doug was very authentic, unpretentious, and genuine. He came in with a lot of purpose; he was there to do a job but he was completely non-judgmental about what was already in the space. Doug’s clearing was worth every single penny in terms of how it contributed to the quality of life in that space. Our great room keeps getting better and better. We’re delighted!

A fun PS: We had several fun moments during this clearing with the family pets; they had a dog and a cat. They held the dog back when I came in because the dog tends to be really hyper and basically go nuts when a new person arrives. Since I was in work mode, my energy was very still and grounded. The dog came to meet me and ended up on its back totally still with me just gently scratching it. They’d never seen this happen before; it was a new doggy response.

But the real kicker happened right before the session started. I was sitting on the floor in their great room and one of the adults said, “I think the cat’s stalking you.” I looked over and asked the cat if she would like to help out. She walked over immediately and climbed across my lap. She draped herself like a cheetah across my thigh, and stayed there for the entire hour-long clearing; she was perfectly content. One of the kids came over, scratched her head, and tried to play with her but she wouldn’t budge. This cat has a history of biting and scratching strangers but she was completely lovely with me as I sat there working with the energetic fields in the room. Evidently, this cat had decided to help me settle the room into a state of impeccability, which cats seem to do so very well.